Today's Insight

I just walked to the store wearing what I thought was a weird assortment of clothes; printed blue leggings from Family Dollar that I usually wear for yoga, a light blue corduroy H&M skirt, an old, gray, H&M sweater that I hope lasts forever because it is at once stylish and comfortable and, last but not the least, a light blue H&M beanie to cover my bald head. It's hard to admit that I'm bald. I do feel really sad about it and what it means. I looked at myself in the mirror before I left home and wondered if I should put my wig on. What if I run into someone I know? Will they recognize me or will they just see a cancer patient? Then, I looked at myself again in the mirror. I hardly recognized myself so I doubt anyone looking at me would know it's me anyway. Today, I feel safe going incognito and not wearing my wig. I recently saw an ad for a trendy store. It featured a beautiful model wearing a pair of beautiful, tailored pajamas with a long-sleeved top and shorts. I liked the style and could see myself wearing them but the interesting thing about the model is she was bald in other words it was an editorial choice. I look at myself in the mirror and see a bald, middle-aged cancer patient. I don't feel attractive at all. I feel horribly self-conscious and sad. I liked my hair.